Random story

Well... part of it anway.

I groaned from my spot on the bed.
What is that annoying sound.... it sounded like an old lady dying, then I labeled it as my alarm, yeah, the two sound very alike. Aww man, why was my alarm going off this early? I reached out to my nightstand and patted it until i found the source of the noise, the threw it out the window, or at least i threw it where my window was supposed to be. I opened my eyes groggily comming out of dreamland, and was quite uppset with that too. I was also very irritated that the vexatious sound did not stop. I looked up and saw a funny looking blue-eyed life-sized doll. "Funny That wasn't there last night"I said sleepily, the doll just giggled. "Come to thinkof it, dolls don't giggle, or float for that matter,"I said comming officialy out of my paradise with no hope of returning, at least for today...
"Mommy says it not niwceto twow twings.She gets mwad when i do," A childish voice said flying closser to me with my still screaching cellphone in her transparent hands.
This is the part that I freak out.


=D
Nah-

Why is it that everbody relates to the song creep. (radiohead)...

How the Fudge is this supposed to be an evil vampire...

sigh.


I mean, for gods sake, look at those boxers....

Imiss the days were you could lookup "evil vampire" on google and actually find vampires, not sparkiling pixies...

Things that annoy me...

1. Stupid e-mails that in the "read later" folder, and the fact that I never get to reading them.

2.Random people Iming me, despite the fact that i have never met them before.. How the hell did they even get my number.

3.The fact that I can't seem to find anyone actually important to me on myspace,facebook,orkut,ect..

4.Not being able to contact  "certain people" even though they are constantly sending me random comments on everything.... *hint hint*

5. When "certain people" get all overprotective and up in my business...

6. Bugs. They are the rencarnation of  pure evil..

7. The number 7.

8. Pms

O.O





I.L.K.

Random....

I had a really random dream, one that included cats, magic powers, a killer kiddie playground maze full of weird obstacles that killed you( like a pool full of alligators, my sister, and cute chibi people...

Yeah......


My dreams are pretty weird.....
( I think I gotta lay off the anime)

-I Liltih Kitsune

Not one of my best days.

I got locked in my room today, by my own stupidity naturaly, but for a few hours, i felt what pure agony was truly like. I was delusional, feeling like a caged animal, with god being the idoit kide that kept provoking me, but only after some time, did i realize what i was feeling,

Fear.

Not ever, in my short existence did I truly, fear something. Hatred, shock, anoyance, yes. but the feeling of imcompetence, of dread, the way my heart picked up, beating profoundly on my chest, was something I was not acostumed, but it made me understand myself just a bit more. Then after trying to break the door open, I cried. A lot. It felt lke everything came crashing down on me, all that happened these past 3-4 years only really beared it's ugly prophetic fangs now, not only did it bear it fangs, it was constanly snidedly commenting on everything, and then I realized that god wasn't provoking me. My past was ( to top it off, My past took the form of a dog *shudders*). Then the pest finnaly left me alone. Alone. Like I always am. The sadness sinking in, the loss. Then slowly I poured all my anger out, taking it all on the pillow (poor pillow it will never be as fluffy again, good thing pillows are deaf) and then looked blankly at the the random laughing faces floating around me, and started listening to music. Then i cried again, beacuse i made the stupid mistake of chosing songs that ended in death, or in rape, but annnnnywayyy.....

After crying, i finnaly had the common sense of trying to preocupy myself doing something that did not ultimatly lead to me looking a the door and either showing it my middle finger, or crying again. SO i started to read,

about a kid.

That was in aslym.

Who was locked inside a room.

and who was ranting random things to himself.

Yeah.... next time i'll go for little red ridding hood, but the story was pretty funny, and I felt sorry for this kid, and cheered him on as he escaped from the evil people. SO after a while, my mom asked in a less crude ,but still weied out way, What the hell was i doing in my room for such a long time, and why the fuck was my door locked. So after sulking a bit and swallowing my pride. I had to tell her I locked myslef in my room.( I still don't know how the hell I did it!)

All in Alll.

Not one of my favorite days.

=(

Give me your hand
But realize I just wanna say goodbye
Please understand I have to leave
And carry on my own life

-I. Lilith Kitsune

So uninspired.......

So here's some music to take up some unused space.

This is an awesome band called Blue October. (They totally get cookies from me.)

This one is self-explanitory.

The Cold Hard Truth....

]


Lmao....no comments

Love the way you lie

Just gonna stand there and watch me burn
But that's alright because I like the way it hurts
Just gonna stand there and hear me cry
But that's alright because I love the way you lie

Was it wrong,
Then why did it feel so right,
Imorality never left me feeling so high.
Condemend by the one who loved me most
I didn’t care to try to find,
The awnser to the one question burning inside.
Stabability is a virture that sadly
I did not have knowledge of,
Couldn’t notice what was right there in front,
Now I’m crying down inside
Misssing the harshness of the situation
Opposites Just as Ice on Fire
Burning you Inside
Freezing what was rightfully once mine.
And yet having the nerve to ask why.







-I. Lilith Kitsune

Little Things.

Just random Things I wrote when I should have been paying atention.


I am.

With a certain just,
and with knives in rust.
Peircing eyes iluminate dawn.
I am.

With a mind in peril.
insanity coming in barels.
I am.

Timely, teethering songs.
with a melody of an unspoken heart.
I am.

Night with a moon in full.
The darkness that is missunderstood.
I am.

The fox which awakens at four.
Which once beloved not merely in folklore.
I am.

A black sheep in a pasture full,
of blundering idiots.
I am.

but with a room full of people,
Telling you no.

I am.
Am I?





Prophecy of Confrontation

In last, the dime drops,
in first, It cries.
In the downpour of human existence,
On a faithful all hallow's eve.
What are we here for?
Why did you fight?
What is the significance,
Of all you thought was right?
Why did you follow me?
Why do you love?
For whowm did you die for?
Why DID you love!
Days and night start to blend,
Fragile causes, cease to suspend,
Three days of fragile night will sigh,
Until he sees what blood has left.
And In the final light, of darkest day,
It will continue to exist as black is left.
Emotions that long have died,( that should have died)
Will overcome her task.

At lovers hand.
both shall perish.
One will live,
Forever in ascending darkness,
To eternal torment.
And in heaven,
NONE SHALL PASS.




-I. Lilith Kitsune.

Is that a Smiley Face I see, Or Are you just happy to See Me!

While the smiley face make work well in the bedroom, you might want to take a glance in the mirror before leaving home if you're going to wear them...
So Pra Discontrariar

-I. Lilith Kitsune

Q and A

WHy Is the world Like this?
Why am I like this.
How can you be a contradiction of yourself, seeing as you don't know yourself.
How can I like something, yet despise it at the same time.
Why am I someone I hate.
Everything about me is predictable.
Why are my emotions so futile.
Why are my actions so cynical.
How can I hate me In both senses both difrently.
WHy do I try to be somthing I'm not...
Why do I try to brefriend some on I hate.
Why do I push myself to keep contact.
Seeing a I KILL EVERYONE I LOVE.
How cam I search for Heaven?
Seeing as I don't belive in it
Seeing as I don't deserve it.
Why do I search for love.
WHy do I thrive to belive in it so much.
Why do I cry at night.
Over and Over.
For somthing that has already past.
For someone I should Forget.
(Why do you haunt me, Why do I hang on to you)
How can I do somthing, Knowing that it's wrong,
Stil I can't seem to care.
I have tortured.
I have killed.
I have driven mad.
Am I mad?
Why Do strive to be normal,
Yet seemingly try so hard to act the oposite.
How can I cry for somethings
and critize others for crying too
Why do I feel pain.
Why Do I hold on So dearly to the thread of life.
Seeing as I cut so many other threads before.
Why do I try to be Immortal.
It's answers I can't find,
And For every answer, 10 more questions are born.

I. Lilith Kitsune

Venting...

There is a time for everything.
A time to laugh.
A time to try to cry.
A time to think your the center of the world.
And a time to find out your nothing.
A time to fall in despear.
To kill yourself inside
A time to move on,and let comrades die.
A time to fall in love,and let your heart fly.
To lose your step, to float on cloud nine.
To come crashing back to earth,
When he kills you in the night.
A time to lose everyone,
A time to lose yourself.
A time to just not care.
And finaly a time to rest.

Yup. Life is tough, you have to hold your head high, Let yourself be humiliated, and when everything dead.

Laugh!
Laugh at yourself,
Laugh at the situation
But most of all Laugh Them
Because you might have lost your mind.
but at least you had a mind to begin with.
Because everyone who ever tried to humilate you,
really is just inseure,
and knows you're worth a whole lot more.





But seriously, if you still diddn't "get my drift"

Find a hole
Crawl,
And Die in it!

but don't come crying to me,
because your not worth my time



I. Lilith Kitsune

They say, to be able to create, you must be mad. You must let go of worldly restrictions. At least it's nice to know that, with all the beautiful things in the world, I'm not the only one who has lost his/her head. (Insane! people rock. Everyone who is insane gets a cookie from me.)

I. Lilith Kitsune

Writing,it's a doorway to one's mind. It lets you express your feelings without fear of being judged, but it's ,more importantly, a way to find yourself,a jorney in you soul by writting, you will discover many things that you had no idea you liked. You will find morals you didn't know you had, and faults will become harder to hide, but once you begin to write, you begin to imagine. Your mind will be baffled by storues of your own creation, stories that will, ussually and sadly, never see an end. Now a tale is a beautiful and powerful thing.Yet, a unfinished story is a deadly game to play with, to give up on a tale is to send it to the tiver of sorrow, where all characters will never see an end, but to simply forget about a syory, is to give it free regin in your mind. You will lose yourself, to what you secretly think you shoild be, and not what you are. So be free to tell tall tales about heroes, about starcrossed lovers,but beware to let a tale become you.

-I. Lilith Kitsune

Again and again....

...
Blah. Really cool word. It's exactly how life is, when your not doing anything. It sucks really, time goes by, whether you want it to or not, but people only exceed until a certain age the they go back, until they're finally emclosed in a small box under the ground and that's probably not as comfortable as your mothers womb. Imagine. You start out in your mom's womb, nice and comfortable. Then just when you think life couldn't be any sweeter, it gets all taken away from you, and you find yourself away from the only thing you love. As you grow older you learn little things and you begin to crawl, speak, walk, learn. Gradually you begin to remmember,and not things you've done last night, but people you've met years ago. You learn to read and write. you become old, Learn to fend for yourself (highschool, it's worse than a wild west film), and soon you learn to care for other people. You earn a companion, a child, a job. You earn a living. Then when your at your peak, you descend, you lose what matters most, your baby moves away, your love dies. When you think, I have nothing left, ALzhiemer hits you, you remmeber less everyday, your hands and feet are shaky, writing is now an impossible feat. You can no longer walk, or crawl, or be independent. You keep going until, your soul is finally passed away. Your body, in a box to rot. What I want to say is, Life is short. You can't think everything thru. Why should you.... You'll lose it anyway....

Live life and don't pay atention to little people telling you what to do. Thay don't matter in the long run.

What is the meaning of life...

Is it the money you make,
The same cash that comands you,
Turning you in time bitter.

Maybe the things you have,
THe ones that you show off,
Molding you into a revoulutionary, capitalist machine,

Or your Religion!
The one that sets you apart,
Just to make you see people for less than people.

Oh Thats not it!Your life's about people,
The ones you live for, only to be betrayed in the end,
Beg for forgiveness, and finally desert you.

Or is it For love!
The repulsive feeling that takes you to idiotcy,
Extracting your logic, making you live with only your soul.

Or is ut for pleasure!
Do you live for meaningless exitement,
For a rush of adrenaline that kills you in te end.

So if not, Why live...

Live for life, not the useless events in it,
If your not satsified with life itself, without expansions,
Then youb don't deserve to live. Your just a waste of space.

I. Lilith Kitsune

How to forget.... the unforgetable.

Take time, breath in, sigh out,
Clear your mind and make it explainable,
Find your reason, Make him Blameable,
Forgive your heart, understandable.
But repeat it... UNALLOWABLE.

Restart it.... inexcusable,
To remend it, It's inuseable,
Express your thoughts, Might be Condonable,
but to Misgight your goal, unjustifiable.
Forgive it you might, that's defensible,

But Forget it....It's Unforgetable.

I. Lilith Kitsune

Love

Love is

• Patient
• Kind
• Sweet
• Bliss

Love has no

• Limits
• Time
• Deffinitiom

But-

Love has

• Pain,for without pain,we canot comprehend joy
• Jelousy,for jelousy fuels passion, and passion is the key to lust.
• Hatred, for without darkness there can be no light,as there can be no love without hatred.

And-

Love needs

• Lust
• Understanding
• Patience

But-

Love is

• Fun and Livley, yet bitter and deadly

Love is Love
and everything else is mearly deffinitions, and contradictions.

Happy Ending?

I don't want to fall in love,
The pain, It's just too much.
The Bliss, Is just so swift.
Like the breeze I feel, on this cliff.

Your eyes, so miserable, haunt my night.
You smile, so sad, beckon me in my mind.
'Together again' you said, over and over again.
and if you seek that, I can comprehend.

The wind picks up,
The water, It's bluer
I see your face, an image of perfection,
It beckons me to come, to indulge in your purity
No going back, i will finally understand.

It hurts, I'm not breathing
I look to you, my sweetest joy,
my wildest woe, You said once you would jump for me.
I didn't respond, but now I know,
I'd jump, I'd die,
I'm dying for you, too.

Waiting

I feel so lonely,
Without you by my side,
You're off to see the world.
I'm left here to cry.

The funny thing is,
You don't remember who I am.
You forgot all the good times.
"How could you forget"
I scream to the sand.

'Don't desert me'
My whispers are blocked away.
'Don't forget me'
My screams are swallowed by the waves.

My voice is blocked by them,
Those miscreants!
My voice to you got lost,
and so your memory is, too.

I'm standing on this rooftop,
and I hear you say 'Don't Jump'
and slowly I go down,
And my feet hit the floor
And slowly I leave this world.
I leave with a broken heart.

Don't worry my love,
I didn't go too far
I'm just waiting,
For you to mend my heart.

Life is comimg

Think Fast.
Life's coming,
Life is tough.
and your alone.

No one...
can do this for you
can cheat
can hold your hand

Head up high,
Breath in deep.
It's Judgment day,
but your not ready.

Scream all you want.
It already has you,
and hate to tell you
but you're not going anywhere.

So go with it,
laugh at it,
Cry over it
but most of all,

Live it,
Don't give up,
Don't hesitate,
Follow your head,
but don't forget your heart,

Cause it wil freeze over time,
and Love,
and after that,
there's just no going back...

I. Lilith Kitsune

My advice.+

Invisiblilty What a gift!
To hide from the world.
To escape it for a bit.

Thousands flock toward,
The fashion taste of some,
Losing originality,
Losing what makes you tick,

Breaking, mending, molding,
you into a mindless body,
inprisoned in a state of forever consuming,
Inprisoned in a bleak state of forever depleting.

So Is it such a gift:
To be seen by the world,
to be stuck in it's standards,
To not have your own choice.

So Go on, I say,
To the ones the world has banned
brave and tall, i Ask, you to stand,
Be Free to have your own choices,
be free to live life,
and conrtinue to stay invisible,
That, is my advice.

-I. Lilith Kitsune

--

Simple ANDS and Contradictions.

Love is Problematic,
Beauty is vain,
Thoughts are harmful,
Words are tame.

Excess of love,can kill,
Excess of beauty,can rage,
People to go against people,
And create a war,for a Helen that doesn't really exist.

Thoughtless thoughts are meaningless,
but thoughtless words can create,
a world full of heartless chaos
and end the world, in a heartless race.

And Loveless love is lust, and there is no beauty in loveless lust,
and witout beauty there is no lust,
And all that's left is a world full of nothing,

And a world full of nothing,
Isn't full of anything,
And all that remains,
Is simple ANDS and Contradictions.